291.  At Bozrah.

   1st October 1945.

 

Bozrah looks very dull in the morning mist, both because of the season and because the town is closed in its narrow streets. It looks dull and dirty. The apostles, who have come back from their shopping at the market, are talking about it. Hotel practice in those days and in such places is so utterly antiquated, that one has to see to one's victuals. Innkeepers obviously do not want to lose any money. So they only cook what customers bring them, and let us hope that they do not steal any of that. Or at most they buy food for customers or sell them what they have in stock, working as butchers, if necessary, preparing poor lambs to be roasted.

Peter does not like buying from the innkeeper and is now squabbling with him. The man, with a rather roguish face, goes to the point of insulting the apostle, calling him «Galilean », while Peter answers back, pointing to a little pig, which the host has just slaughtered for some guests: «I am a Galilean, and you are a pig, you pagan. I would not stay in your stinking inn for one hour, if it depended on me. You thief and... (and he adds here a very clear epithet... which I leave in my pen).» I realise that between the people of Bozrah and the Galileans there is one of the many regional or religious incompatibilities, of which Israel, or rather Palestine was full.

The host shouts louder: «If you were not with the Nazarene, and I were not better than your filthy Pharisees who hate Him without any good reason, I would wash your face with the blood of the pig, so you would have to get out of here and rush to purify yourself. But I respect Him, Whose power is known. And I tell you, that notwithstanding all your fuss, you are sinners. We are better than you are. We do not lay snares neither do we betray. You, faugh! You are a lot of unfair traitors and rascals and you do not even respect the few holy people among you.»

«Who are you calling traitors? Us? Ah! In God's truth I...» Peter is furious and is about to break upon the man, when his brother and James hold him back, and Simon Zealot intervenes with Matthew.

But Peter's wrath is abated not so much by their intervention as by the voice of Jesus Who appears at one of the doors and says: «You now, Simon, will be quiet. And you, too, man.»

«Lord, this man was the first to insinuate and threaten.»

«Nazarene, I was offended first.»

I, he. He and I. The two culprits cast blame on each other.

Jesus comes forward seriously and calmly. «You are both wrong. And you, Simon, more than he is. Because you know the doctrine of love, of forgiveness, of meekness, of patience and brotherhood. In order not to be ill‑treated as a Galilean, you must make yourself respected as a saint. And you, man, bless the Lord if you feel that you are better than others and endeavour to be worthy of becoming better and better. And above all, do not foul your soul with false charges. My disciples neither betray nor lay snares.»

«Are You sure, Nazarene? Well, then, why did those four come and ask me whether You had come, with whom You were and so many more questions? »

«What? Who are they? Where are they? » The apostles gather round him, forgetting that they are drawing close to a person still wet with the blood of a pig, which struck them with horror shortly before and kept them away.

«Go and mind your own business. You may stay, Misace.»

The apostles go into the room from which Jesus came out, and only Jesus and the innkeeper are left in the yard, one facing the other. The merchant is a few steps from Jesus and is watching the scene spellbound.

«Tell Me the truth, man. And forgive if blood made one of My disciples furious. Who are those four and what did they say? »

«I do not know exactly who they are. They are certainly scribes and Pharisees from the other side. I do not know who brought them here. I have never seen them. But they are well informed of You. They know from where You have come, where You are going, with whom You are. But they wanted confirmation from me. No. I may be a rascal. But I know my business. I know nobody and I see nothing. I know nothing. With regard to others, of course. As far as I am concerned, I know everything. But why should I tell others, particularly those hypocrites, what I know? Am I a rascal? Yes. If necessary I side also with robbers. In any case, You know... But I could not steal or try to steal Your freedom, honour and life. And those ‑ I am no longer Phara of Ptolemy if what I say is not true and those are lying in wait for You, to do You harm. And who sent them? Perhaps someone from Perea or the Decapolis? Or someone from Trachonitis or Gaulanitis or Hauran? No. We either do not know You, or if we have heard of You, we respect You as a just man, if we do not believe in You as a saint. So, who sent them? Someone on Your side and perhaps one of Your friends, because they know too many things...»

«It is easy to be informed of my caravan...» says Misace.

«No, merchant. Not of you, but of the others who are with Jesus. I do not know and I do not want to know. I do not see and I do not want to see. But I say to You: if You are guilty, make amends, if You know that You have been betrayed, take the necessary action.»

«I am neither guilty, man, nor betrayed. The only trouble is that Israel does not understand Me. But how do you know about Me? »

«Through a boy. A mischievous boy who had a bad reputation at Bozrah and Arbela. Here, because he came here to commit his sins, there because he dishonoured his family. Then he became converted and more honest than a just man. And he passed by with Your disciples, a disciple himself, and is waiting for You at Arbela, to honour You with his father and mother. And he tells everybody that You changed his heart through his mother's prayers. If this region ever becomes a holy one, Philip of James will have the merit of having sanctified it. And if there is anyone who believes in You in Bozrah, it is due to him.»

«Where are the scribes now, who came here? »

«I don't know. They went away because I told them that I had no rooms for them. I had them, but I did not want to give hospitality to snakes and thus have them close to the dove. They are certainly in this area. Be careful.»

«Thank you, man, What is your name? »

«Phara. I did my duty. Remember me.»

«Yes. And you must remember God. And forgive My Simon. The great love he has for Me at times blinds him.»

«No harm. I offended him as well... But it hurts to be insulted. You do not insult...»

Jesus sighs... He then says: «Will you help the Nazarene? »

«If I can...»

«I would be glad to speak from this yard...»

«And I will let You speak. When? »

«Between the sixth and ninth hour.»

«Go wherever You want and do not worry. Bozrah will know that You are going to speak. I will see to it.»

«May God reward you for it » and Jesus smiles at him, a smile which is already a reward. He then goes to the room where He was before.

Alexander Misace says: «Master, will You smile at me as well, like that?... I am also going to tell the citizens to come and listen to the Bounty Which is speaking. I know many. Goodbye.»

«May God reward you, too » and Jesus smiles at him.

He enters the room. The women are around Mary, Whose face is sorrowful and She gets up at once and goes towards Her Son. She does not speak. Her whole attitude is uncertainty. Jesus smiles at Her and He replies to Her saying to everybody: «Be free by the sixth hour. I will speak here to many people. In the meantime go, everybody, with the exception of Simon Peter, John and Ermasteus. Go and announce Me and give plentiful alms.»

The apostles go away.

Peter slowly approaches Jesus Who is near the women and asks: «Why did You not send me as well? »

«When one is too impulsive, one stays at home. Simon, Simon! When will you learn to be charitable to your neighbour? For the time being it is a burning flame, but only for Me, it is a straight and stiff blade, but only for Me. Be mild, Simon of Jonah.»

«You are right, Master. Your Mother has already reproached me, as She knows how to, but without hurting. But it penetrated right into me. But... reproach me as well, but do not look at me so sadly.»

«Be good... Syntyche, I would like to speak to you privately. Come up to the terrace. Will you come, as well, Mother...»

And on the rustic terrace, which covers one wing of the building, in the sunshine which warms the air, walking slowly between Mary and the Greek woman, Jesus says: «Tornorrow we will part for a little while. When near Arbela, you women with John of Endor, will go towards the Sea of Galilee and will continue together as far as Nazareth. But as I do not want to send you by yourselves with an almost disabled man, I will get My brothers and Simon Peter to accompany you. I can foresee that there will be some reluctance to separate. But obedience is the virtue of the just. When you go through the country over which Chuza watches in Herod's name, Johanna can find some more people to escort you on the rest of the way. You will then send back Alphaeus' sons and Simon Peter. But the reason why I asked you to come up here is as follows. I want to tell you, Syntyche, that I have decided for you to stay for some time in My Mother's house. She already knows. John of Endor and Marjiam will be staying with you. Stay there willingly, perfecting yourself more and more in Wisdom. I want you to take great care of poor John. I am not saying this to My Mother because She does not need any advice. You can understand John and sympathise with him, and he can do you much good because he is an experienced master. I will come later. Oh! Quite soon! And we will often meet. I hope to find you wiser and wiser in the Truth. I bless you particularly, Syntyche. This is My farewell from you, for this time. You will find love and hatred in Nazareth as anywhere else. But in My house you will find peace. Always.»

«Nazareth will ignore me and I will ignore Nazareth. I will live nourishing myself with the Truth and the world will be nothing to me, Lord.»

«Very well. You may go, Syntyche. And do not mention it to anybody, for the time being. Mother, You know... I trust these dearest pearls of Mine to You. While we are in peace, among ourselves, Mother, let Your Jesus refresh Himself in Your caresses...»

«How much hatred, Son! »

«How much love! »

«How much bitterness, My dear Jesus! »

«How much sweetness! »

«How much incomprehension, My Son! »

«How much comprehension, Mother! »

«Oh! My darling, My Dear Son! »

«Mother! Joy of God and Mine! Mother! »

They kiss each other and remain together, on the stone bench against the low terrace wall: Jesus embracing His Mother, a loving protector, Mary reclining Her head on Her Son's shoulder, Her hands in His: happy... The world is so distant... buried in the waves of love and faithfulness...

 

292.  The Sermon and Miracles at Bozrah.

   2nd October 1945.

 

...And the world is so close with its waves of hatred, betrayal, sorrow, need, curiosity. And the waves come, like those of the sea in a harbour, to die here, in the yard of the inn at Bozrah, which the respectful host, whose heart is better than his face makes one suppose, has cleaned of excrement and dirt. There is a large crowd of people, both local and strangers, but of the same region. And there are people whose conversation gives me to understand that they come from very far, from the lake area or beyond the lake. I catch the names of villages, and parts of sorrowful stories in the conversation of the people awaiting Jesus. Gadara, Hippo, Gerghesa, Gamala, Aphek, Nain, Endor, Jezreel, Magdala and Korazim, are mentioned by many people together with the stories of the reasons why they have come from so far.

«When I heard that He had come through Trans‑Jordan, I was discouraged. But some disciples came when I was about to go back to Jezreel and they said to us, who were waiting at Capernaum: "He is certainly beyond Gerasa by now. Waste no time, go to Bozrah or Arbela" and I came with these people...»

«I instead, saw some Pharisees pass through Gadara. They were asking where was Jesus of Nazareth, Whom they knew to be in the area. My wife is ill. I joined them. Then yesterday at Arbela I heard that He was coming to Bozrah first, so I came here.»

«I have come from Gadara for this boy. He was gored by a furious cow. He has been left in that state...» and he shows his son who is utterly shrivelled and unable to move his arms.

«I could not bring mine. I come from Megiddo. What do you think? Will He cure him from here also? » moans a woman whose face is red with weeping.

«No, the sick person must be present.»

«No It is enough to have faith.»

«No. Unless He imposes His hands, one is not cured. His disciples also do that.»

«You have come a long way for nothing, woman.»

The woman begins to weep saying: «Poor me! I left him when he was almost dying, hoping... He will not cure him, and I will not comfort him in his death...»

Another woman consoles her: «Don't believe that, woman. I have come to thank Him because He worked a great miracle for me, without leaving the mountain on which He was speaking.»

«What was the matter with your son? »

«It was not my son. It was my husband who had become mad...» and the two women continue speaking in low voices.

«It is true. Also a mother at Arbela had her son redeemed without the Master seeing him » says a man from Arbela and he goes on speaking to some people near him...

«Make way, for pity's sake! Make way! » shout some bearers of a litter which is completely covered.

The crowds open out and the litter goes by with its sorrowful load, and stops at the end of the yard, almost behind a rick of straw. Is it a man or a woman lying on the litter? Who knows!

Two Pharisees come in: they are vainglorious and well preserved and more proud than ever. They assault the poor host as if they were mad, shouting: «You cursed liar! Why did you tell us that He was not here? Are you His accomplice? How dare you despise us, the holy ones in Israel, to favour... Whom, after all? How do you know who He is? What is He to you? »

«What is He? What you are not. But I did not lie. He came a few hours after you had left. He did not hide Himself, neither do I hide Him. But as I am the boss here, I tell you at once: "Get out of my house!". You do not insult the Nazarene here. Do you understand? And if you do not understand my words, I can speak to you in a more factual way, you jackals! »

The robust innkeeper seems so decided to come to blows that the two Pharisees change tone and become like creeping pups menaced by lash. «But we are looking for Him to revere Him! What are you thinking of? The thought that we might not see Him through your fault made us furious. We know Who He is. The holy and blessed Messiah, to Whom we are not worthy to raise our eyes. We are dust, He is the glory of Israel. Take us to Him. Our souls are yearning to hear His words.»

The host imitates their voices and gestures in a wonderful way: «Oh! Of course! And how could I ever suspect it was not so, since I am so well aware of the fame of Pharisees' justice?! Of course! You have come to worship Him! You are yearning for that! I will go and tell Him! I am going... No, by Satan! You shall not follow me! Neither will you, or I will strike you so much, you poisonous mummies, that I will make one knock into the other. Stay here. You stay here, where I am putting you. And you here. And I am sorry I cannot knock you into the ground up to your necks and use you as pegs to tie the pigs to be slaughtered» and he passes from words to deeds by seizing the leaner Pharisee by his armpits, lifting him up and dropping him so violently on the ground, that if it were not very hard the poor fellow would have sunk into it up to his ankles. But the ground is hard and the Pharisee remains standing like a puppet, after being tossed about so much. Then the host gets hold of the other man, and although he is rather fat, the innkeeper raises and drops him with the same fury, and as the Pharisee reacts wriggling, he knocks him down and makes him sit: a bundle of flesh and cloth... He then goes away uttering a nasty word which is lost among the moans of the two and the laughter of many more.

He goes through a corridor into a small yard, he climbs a little staircase, reaches a porched gallery and enters a large room in which Jesus and His group are about to finish their meal with the merchant.

«Two of the four Pharisees have come. You had better see what You must do. For the time being I have seen to them. They wanted to come with me. But I did not want them. They are now down in the yard with many sick people and many others.»

«I will come at once. Thank you, Phara, You may go.»

They all get up. Jesus orders His disciples and the women to stay where they are, with the exception of His Mother, Mary Clopas, Susanna and Salome. But seeing the sad countenance of those who have been excluded, He says: «Go up to the terrace. You will hear Me just the same.»

He goes out with the apostles and the four women. He goes back the same way as the host came and enters the large yard. The crowds crane their necks to see, and those who are sly climb up on to straw stacks, on carts standing on one side, or on the edge of reservoirs...

The two Pharisees go and meet Him ceremoniously. Jesus greets them with His usual salutation as if they were His most faithful friends. But He does not stop to reply to their unctuous questions: «Are you so few? And without disciples? So they have left You? »

Jesus continuing to walk replies gravely: «No one left Me. You have come from Arbela where you met those who precede Me, and in Judaea you met Judas of Simon, Thomas, Nathanael and Philip.»

The stout Pharisee no longer dare follow Him and he stops all of a sudden blushing. The other, who is more barefaced, insists: «That is true. But as we knew that You were with faithful disciples and with some women, we were surprised at seeing You with so few people. We wanted to see Your new conquests and congratulate You » and he gives a false smile.

«My new conquests? There they are! » and Jesus makes a wide semicircular gesture, pointing at the crowds, which are mainly from the region beyond the Jordan, that is from this region where Bozrah is. And without giving the Pharisee time to retort, He begins to speak.

«Those who previously did not inquire about Me, have been looking for Me. And those who previously did not look for Me have found Me. And I said: "Here I am" to a nation which did not invoke My Name. Glory be to the Lord Who speaks the truth through the lips of the prophets! Looking at this crowd which has gathered round Me I really rejoice in the Lord because I see that the promises, which the Eternal Father made to Me when He sent Me to the world, have been fulfilled. Those promises which I Myself, with the Father and the Paraclete, put in the thoughts, on the lips and in the hearts of the prophets, the promises of which I was aware before becoming Flesh and which encouraged Me to be made flesh. And they encourage Me. Yes, they encourage Me against hatred, malice, mistrust and falsehood. Those who previously did not inquire about Me, have been looking for Me. And those who did not look for Me, have found Me. How come, if I was instead rejected by those to whom I had stretched out My hands saying: "Here I am"? And yet they knew Me, whereas these people here did not know Me. So?

Here is the key to the mystery. It is not a fault to ignore, but it is a fault to deny. And too many of those who know Me and to whom I stretched My hands, have denied Me as if I were illegitimate or a thief, a corrupting demon, because their pride has extinguished their faith and they have gone astray along bad, twisted sinful ways, leaving the way which My voice points out to them. Sin is in the heart, on the table, in the beds, in the hearts, in the minds of this people which rejects Me and which, seeing its own filth reflected everywhere, sees it on Me also, and its bitterness piles it up more and more, and it says to Me: "Go away, because You are unclean".

So what will He say, Who is coming with His robe dyed red, handsome in His garment, and is walking in the power of His strength? Will He accomplish already what Isaiah says, and will He not be quiet, but will He pour on their laps what they deserve? No, He will not. First He has to tread the winepress alone, abandoned by everybody, to make the wine of Redemption. The wine that exhilarates the just and makes them blessed, the wine that exhilarates the guilty of the great sin, to crush their sacrilegious power into crumbs. Yes, My wine, which is maturing hour by hour in the sun of Eternal Love, will be the ruin and salvation of many, as it is stated in a prophecy not yet written, but deposited in the unsplit rock from which the Vine giving the Wine of eternal Life sprang up.

Do you understand? No, you doctors of Israel do not understand. But it does not matter whether you understand. The darkness of which Isaiah speaks is descending upon you: "They have eyes and do not see. They have ears and do not hear". You shield the Light with your hatred, so that one can say that the Light was repelled by darkness and the world refused to know it.

But exult, you who were in the dark and believed in the Light which was announced to you, and you desired it, sought it and found it. Exult, o faithful people who have come to Salvation crossing mountains, valleys and lakes without considering the burden of the long journey. The same applies to the other spiritual journey which will take you, o people of Bozrah, from the darkness of ignorance to the light of Wisdom.

Exult, o people of Hauran! Exult in the joy of knowledge. Truly it refers also to you and to your neighbouring peoples, when the Prophet sings that your camels and dromedaries will crowd the streets of Naphtali and Zebulun to worship the true God, and to be His servants in the holy mild law, which does not impose anything in order to give divine paternity and eternal happiness but compliance with the ten commandments of the Lord: to love the true God with one's whole being, to love one's neighbour as oneself, to keep the Sabbath without desecrating it, to honour one's parents, not to kill, not to steal, not to commit adultery, not to bear false witness, not to covet the wife or property of other people. Oh! you are blessed. if coming from farther away you will go beyond those who belonged to the house of the Lord and went out of it, urged by the ten commandments of Satan: dislike of God, love of oneself, corruption of cult, harshness towards parents, murderous desire, attempt to steal other people's holiness, fornication with Satan, false witness, envy of the nature and mission of the Word, and the horrible sin which ferments and matures in the depth of hearts, of too many hearts.

Exult, you who are thirsty! Exult, you who are hungry! Exult, you who are afflicted! Were you rejected? Were you proscribed? Were you despised? Were you strangers? Come! Exult! It is no longer so. I give you homes, wealth, paternity and fatherland. I give you Heaven. Follow Me, because I am the Saviour! Follow Me, because I am the Redeemer! Follow Me, because I am the Life! Follow Me, because I am He to Whom the Father refuses no grace! Exult in My love! Exult! And that you may realise that I love you, you who have sought Me in your sorrows, you who have believed in Me even before knowing Me, that this may be a day of true exultation, I pray thus: "Father, Holy Father! On all the wounds, diseases, sores of bodies, on the grief, tortures, remorse of hearts, on all the faithful who are springing up, on those who are vacillating, on those who are strengthening, let health, grace, peace descend! Peace in My Name! Grace in Your Name! Health through Our reciprocal love! Bless them, o Most Holy Father! Gather and form one fold with these lost children of Yours and Mine! Let them be where I will be, one with You, Holy Father, with You, with Me and with the Most Divine Spirit".»

Jesus, with His arms stretched out crosswise, His palms upwards towards the sky, His face raised, His voice blaring like a silver tuba, is overwhelming in His speech... He remains thus, silent, for some moments. Then His sapphire eyes stop looking at the sky to look at the large yard crowded with people who are sighing deeply moved or are quivering with hope; He joins His hands moving them forward and with a smile which transfigures Him, He utters a final cry: «Exult, you who believe and hope! People of sufferers, rise and love the Lord your God!»

The healing of the diseased is simultaneous and general. Trilling voices and roaring shouts praise the Saviour. A woman squeezes through the crowd, from the far end of the yard, dragging the sheet that had covered her and collapses at the feet of the Lord. This time the terrified crowds utter a different shout: «Mary, the leprous wife of Joachim! » and they run in all directions.

«Be not afraid! She is cured. Contact with her can do you no harm » says Jesus reassuring them. And He says to the prostrated female: «Stand up, woman. You have been rewarded for your great hope and you are forgiven for neglecting prudence towards your brothers. Go back home after the salutary ablutions.»

The woman, who is young and quite beautiful, stands up weeping. Jesus shows her to the crowds who have come back and admire the miracle shouting out of astonishment.

«Her husband, who adored her, had built a shelter for her at the end of his fields and went to its border every evening and gave her some food weeping...»

«She became infected through her pity, taking care of a beggar who did not say that he was a leper.»

«But how did Mary, the good woman, come here? »

«On that litter. How did we not notice Joachim's two servants? »

«They ran the risk of being stoned for that.»

«Their mistress! They love her, she is so kind that they love her more than themselves...»

Jesus makes a gesture and they all become silent: «You can see that love and goodness bring miracles and joy. So, be good. Go, woman. No one will do you any harm. Peace be with you and with your household.»

The woman, followed by the servants who have burnt the litter in the middle of the yard, goes out and many people follow her.

Jesus dismisses the crowd after listening to some people and He retires to the house followed by those who were with Him.

«What words, Master! »

«How transfigured You were! »

«What a voice! »

«And what miracles! »

«Did you see the Pharisees flee? »

«They went away like two creeping lizards immediately after the first words.»

«The people of Bozrah and of all the villages here have a wonderful recollection of You...»

«Mother, what do You say? »

«I bless You, Son, on their behalf and Mine.»

«Well, Your blessing will follow Me until we meet again.»

«Why do You say that, Lord? Are the women leaving us? »

«Yes, Simon, Tomorrow at daybreak Alexander is leaving for Aera. We will go with him as far as the road to Arbela and we will then leave him. And with regret, believe Me, Alexander, because you have been a kind guide for the Pilgrim. I will always remember you, Alexander.»

The old man is moved. He is standing with his arms folded on his chest, in the deep eastern salutation, bending a little in front of Jesus. But when he hears His words, he says: «Above all, remember me when You are in Your Kingdom.»

«Do you wish that, Misace? »

«Yes, my Lord.»

«I also wish something of you.»

«Which, Lord? If I can I will give it to You, even if it were the most precious thing I possess.»

It is the most precious. I want your soul. Come to Me. I told you, at the beginning of our journey, that I hoped to give you a gift at the end of it. My gift is Faith. Do you believe in Me, Misace? »

«I do believe, Lord.»

«Then sanctify your soul so that faith may not be for you not only an inert but also a harmful gift.»

«My soul is old. But I will endeavour to make it new. Lord, I am an old sinner. Absolve me and bless me, because as from this moment I am beginning a new life. I will take Your blessing with me as the best escort in my journey towards Your Kingdom... Shall we ever meet again, Lord? »

«Not on this earth. But you will hear of Me and you will believe even more because I will not leave you without evangelization. Goodbye, Misace. We shall not have much time tomorrow to say goodbye to each other. Let us do so now, before taking our food together for the last time.» He embraces and kisses him.

The apostles and disciples also do so. The women greet him all together.

But Misace kneels down almost in front of Mary saying: «May Your light of a pure morning star shine in my mind until my death.»

«Until Life, Alexander. Love My Son and you will love Me, and I will love you.»

Simon Peter asks: «But shall we be going from Arbela to Aera? I am afraid we may be caught in bad weather. There is so much fog... We have had it for three days at dawn and sunset...»

«That is because we have been coming down here. Do you not think that we have come down a good deal? It is so. Tomorrow you will be climbing towards the mountains of the Decapolis and there will be no more fog there » explains Misace.

«Come down? When? It was a flat road...»

«Yes, but in continuous descent. Oh! so slowly that one does not notice it. But in many miles...»

«How long shall we be staying at Arbela? »

«You, James and Judas, not even one hour » replies Jesus resolutely.

«James and Judas... I... not even one hour? And where am I going if I am not staying with you all? »

«You are going away. As far as the land in the guardianship of Chuza. You will take My Mother and the women there, with the others. They will then proceed by themselves with Johanna's servants and you will come back and join Me at Aera.»

«Oh! Lord! You are angry with me and You are punishing me... How much You grieve me, Lord! »

«Simon, he feels that he is punished who knows that he is guilty. Being guilty must grieve you, not the punishment in itself. But I do not think that it is a punishment to accompany My Mother and the women disciples on their way back home.»

«But would it not be better if You came with us? Never mind Aera and these places and come with us.»

«I promised to go and I will go.»

«Then I will come, too.»

«You will obey without complaining, as My brothers do.»

«And if You meet some Pharisees? »

«You are certainly not the most suitable to convert them. It is just because I will meet some that I want you, James and Judas to go away with the women and with John of Endor and Marjiam before Arbela.»

«Ah!... I see! All right.»

Jesus turns round to the women and blesses them one by one, giving each of them suitable advice.

The Magdalene on bending to kiss the feet of her Saviour asks: «Shall I see You again before I go back to Bethany? »

«Most certainly, Mary. In the month of Ethanim I will be on the lake.»

 

 

 

293.  Farewell to the Women Disciples.

   3rd October 1945.

 

The reverential respect of Misace is shown the following morning, when he makes the pilgrims go the first miles on the camels after adjusting their loads, turning them into comfortable cradles for the inexperienced riders. And it is quite funny to see dark or fair‑haired heads emerging from bundles and cases, with long hair reaching down to the men's ears, or tresses showing through the women's veils. As the camels are moving very fast, the wind now and again blows back the veils and the bright golden hair of Mary Magdalene or the milder fair hair of the Blessed Virgin shines in the sunshine, while the dark or brown‑haired heads of Johanna, Syntyche, Martha, Marcella, Susanna and Sarah show indigo or dark bronze reflections, and the grey‑haired heads of Eliza, Salome and Mary Clopas seem to be sprayed with silver dust in the clear warm sun. The men are proceeding bravely on the new means of transport and Marjiam is laughing happily.

They realise that the merchant's statement is true, when, turning round, they see Bozrah down in the valley, with its towers and high houses in the labyrinth of the narrow streets. Low hills appear to the north‑west. The road to Aera runs at their feet; the caravan stops to let the pilgrims dismount and part. The camels kneel down with remarkable pitching which makes more than one woman scream. I now see that wisely the women had been fastened to the saddles with belts. The women are somewhat stunned with so much rolling, but they are well rested.

Misace dismounts as well; he had taken Marjiam up on his saddle, and while the cameleers resettle the loads in the usual way, he approaches Jesus to bid Him goodbye once again.

«Thank you, Misace. You have saved us a lot of fatigue and time.»

«Yes. We have covered twenty miles in a short time. The camels have long legs, even if they do not amble smoothly. I do hope that the women have not suffered too much because of that.»

All the women reassure him that they are well rested and have not suffered.

«You are now six miles from Arbela. May Heaven accompany you and make your journey smooth. Goodbye, my Lord. Allow me to kiss Your holy feet. I am happy to have met You, Lord. Remember me.» Misace kisses Jesus' feet, he mounts again and his cry makes the camels rise... And the caravan leaves at a gallop on the flat road, in a cloud of dust.

«A good man! I am all bruised, but in compensation, my feet have had a rest. But how much knocking! A north wind storm on the lake is nothing in comparison! Are you laughing? But I did not have the cushions the women had. Long live my boat! It is still the cleanest and safest thing. And now let us pick up our bags and move on.»

They compete with one another in loading themselves. The winners are those who will be staying with Jesus, that is, Matthew, the Zealot, James and John, Ermasteus and Timoneus, who take everything to spare the three who will be going with the women, or rather the four, because there is also John of Endor, whose help must be very relative, owing to the poorly state he is in.

They walk fast for a few miles. When they reach the top of a low hill which acted as a screen to the west, a fertile plain appears, surrounded by a ring of hills, which are higher than the one they met previously, and in the middle of the plain there is a long isolated hill. There is a town in the plain: Arbela. They descend and are soon in the plain.

They proceed for a little while, then Jesus stops saying: «This is where we part. Let us take our food together and then we shall part. This is the cross‑road to Gadara. You will take that road. It is the shortest one and before evening you will be in the territory watched over by Chuza.»

There is not much enthusiasm... But they obey.

While taking their food Marjiam says: «Well, it is also the moment to give You this pouch. The merchant gave it to me when I was in the saddle with him. He said to me: "You will give it to Jesus before parting from Him and you will tell Him to love me as He loves you". Here it is. It was heavy here, in my tunic. It seems to be full of stones.»

«Let us see! Money is heavy! » They are all curious.

Jesus undoes the thin twisted leather strips which fasten the pouch made with gazelle leather, I think, because it looks like chamois leather, and empties its contents on His lap. Some coins roll out. But they are the least. Many small bags of very fine byssus roll out as well: little bundles tied with a thread. Beautiful hues shine through the very light linen tissue and the sun seems to light a tiny fire in each little bundle, as if they were embers under a thin veil of ash.

«What is it? Undo them, Master.»

They are all bending over Jesus Who calmly unties the knot of a little bundle shining with golden reflections: topazes of various sizes, still unrefined, sparkle freely in the sun. Another little bundle: rubies, drops of coagulated blood. Another one: a precious delightful display of green emerald chips. Another one: bits of sky in pure sapphires. Another one: languid amethysts. Another: violet indigo of beryls. Another: wonderful black onyxes... And so on for twelve little bundles. In the last one, the heaviest, a golden sparkling of chrysolites, there is a small parchment: «For Your Rational (1) of true Pontiff and King ».

Jesus' lap is a little meadow strewn with bright stripped petals... The apostles plunge their hands into that light which has become many‑coloured matter. They are bewildered...

Peter whispers: «If Judas of Kerioth were here!...»

«Be quiet! It is better that he is not » says Thaddeus resolutely.

Jesus asks for a piece of cloth to make one parcel only of the stones and He is pensive while the others continue commenting.

The apostles say: «That man was rich indeed! » and Peter makes everybody laugh exclaiming: «We have been trotting on a throne of gems. I did not think I was sitting an such splendour. I wish it had been softer! What will You do with it now? »

«I will sell it for the poor.» He looks up at the women smiling.

«And where will You find a jeweller here, who can buy those things? »

«Where? Here. Johanna, Martha, Mary, will you buy My treasure? »

The three women, without even consulting with one another, say: «Yes » impulsively. But Martha adds: «We have little money here.»

«You will let Me have it at Magdala at the new moon.»

«How much do You want, Lord? »

«For Myself, nothing. For My poor, very much.»

«Give me it. You will have very much » says the Magdalene, and she takes the purse and conceals it in her breast.

 

 

(1) The Rational was the precious pectoral of judgement worn by the High Priest when he went into the presence of Yahweh (See Exodus 28, 15‑30).

 

Jesus keeps only the money. He stands up. He kisses His Mother, His aunt His cousins and then he kisses Peter, John of Endor and Marjiam. He blesses the women and dismisses them. And they go away, looking back now and again, until they disappear round a bend.

Jesus goes with the rest towards Arbela. It is only a small group now, only eight people in all. They walk fast without speaking towards the town which is becoming closer and closer.

 

 

 

 

 

294.  At Arbela.

   4th October 1945.

 

The very first person they approach when inquiring about Philip of Jacob makes them realise how much work the young disciple has done. The person they asked is a little old wrinkled woman, who is carrying with difficulty a jug full of water. Gazing with her little deep‑set eyes at the handsome face of John who asked her the question, after greeting her «Peace be with you » so gently as to enrapture her, she says: «Are you the Messiah? »

«No. But I am His disciple. He is coming, He is over there.»

The old woman puts her jug on the ground and hobbles in the direction pointed out to her and kneels down in front of Jesus.

John, who has remained with Simon near the pitcher which has turned over spilling half of its contents, says to his companion smiling: «We had better pick up this jug and join the old woman.» He does so while his companion adds: «We can use it to drink. We are all thirsty.»

When they reach the old woman ‑ who not knowing what to say exactly continues to repeat: «Lovely, holy Son of the most holy Mother » still on her knees and drinking in with her eyes the figure of Jesus, Who smiles at her repeating in His turn: «Stand up, mother » ‑ when they reach her, John says to her: «We have taken your jug. But it turned over and there is little water left in it. If you give it to us, we will drink this water and then we will fill the jug for you.».

«Yes, my sons, of course. And  I am sorry that I have but water for you. I wish I had milk in my breast as when I fed my Judas, in order to give you the sweetest thing there is on the earth: the milk of a mother. I would like to have wine, choice wine, to strengthen you. But Marianne of Elisha is old and poor...»

«Your water is wine and milk to Me, mother, because it is given with love » replies Jesus and He is the first to drink out of the jug handed to Him by John. Then the others drink.

The old woman, who has at last stood up, looks at them as if she were looking at Paradise and when, after they have all drunk, she sees that they are about to throw away the water left in the jug, to fill it at the fountain gurgling at the end of the street, she rushes forward, defending her jug and saying: «No, don't. This water is more holy than lustral water, as He drank out of it. I will keep it carefully so that I may be cleansed with it when I die.» And she seizes her jug saying: «I will take it home. I have some more and I will fill them. But come first, o Holy One, that I may show You Philip's house » and she trots along swiftly, all bent, with a smile on her wrinkled face and her little eyes shining with joy. She trots along holding the hem of Jesus' mantle in her hand, as if she were afraid He might run away from her, and she defends her jug from the insistent apostles, who do not want her to carry that weight. She trots along blissfully, looking at the street and the houses in Arbela, the former deserted, the latter already closed as it is getting dark, and she looks like a conquerer, happy in her victory.

Finally, they pass from the side street into a more central one, where there are people hastening home ‑ and the people watch her spellbound, pointing at her and questioning her ‑ and, after waiting to have a circle of people around her, she shouts: «I have here Philip's Messiah. Run and tell everybody and first of all Jacob's household. So that they may be ready to honour the Saint.» She shouts at the top of her voice. She can make herself obeyed. It is the moment of authority of a poor, lonely, unknown little old woman of the people. And she sees the whole town deeply moved by her command.

Jesus, so much taller than she is, smiles at her when she looks at Him now and again and He lays His hand on her venerable head, in a filial caress which overwhelms her with happiness.

Jacob's house is in a central street. It is open and lit up and through the door one can see a long hall in which there are people holding lights, and they rush out joyfully as soon as Jesus appears in the street: the young disciple Philip, his father and mother, relatives, servants and friends.

Jesus stops and replies gravely to Jacob's deep bow, He then bends over Philip's mother who has knelt down to revere Him, and He makes her stand up blessing her and saying: «Be always happy because of your faith.» He then greets the disciple who has come with the other man who was with him, and whom Jesus greets as well.

Old Marianne, however, does not leave the hem of the mantle or her place beside Jesus until they are about to enter the entrance hall. She then whispers: «Bless me that I may be happy! You will now stay here... I am going to my poor house and... and this beautiful thing is all over! » How much regret there is in her ageing voice!

Jacob, to whom his wife has spoken in a low voice, says: «No, Marianne of Elisha. Stay in my house as if you were a disciple. Stay as long as the Master will be with us and be thus happy.»

«May God bless you, man. You know what charity is.»

«Master... she brought You to my house. You have brought me grace and love. I am only giving back, and in a poor way, what I have received from You and from her so abundantly. Come in, and let my house welcome You.»

The crowds outside in the street see them go in and shout: «And what about us? We want to hear His word.»

Jesus turns round: «It is night and you are tired. Prepare your souls through a holy rest and tomorrow you will hear the Voice of God. For the time being, peace and blessings be with you.» And the front door closes on the happiness of this house.

James of Zebedee watches the Lord during the purification after the journey: «Perhaps it was better to speak at once and depart at dawn. There are some Pharisees in town. Philip told me. They will vex You.»

«Those who might have been vexed by them are far away. The trouble they may cause Me is of no importance. There is love that will cancel it...»

The following morning... Jesus goes out among the joyful relatives of Philip and the apostles. The old woman follows them. He meets the people of Arbela who are patiently waiting for Him. He goes to the main square where He begins to speak.

«We read in the eighth chapter of the second book of Ezra, what I will now repeat to you: "When the seventh month came..." (Jesus says to me: "Do not write anything else. I will repeat the words of the book in full").

When does a people return to its country? When it goes back to the land of its ancestors. I have come to take you back to the land of your Father, to the Kingdom of the Father. And I can do that because I was sent for that. So I have come to take You to the Kingdom of God and it is therefore fair to compare you to those who repatriated with Zorobabel to Jerusalem, the city of the Lord, and it is fair to do with you what Ezra the scribe did with the people gathered once again within the sacred walls. Because it is incomparable foolishness to rebuild a town dedicating it to the Lord, without restoring souls, which are like as many little towns of God.

How can these little spiritual towns, dilapidated by so many events, be restored? Which materials should be used to make them solid, beautiful, lasting? The materials are in the precepts of the Lord: the ten commandments, of which you are aware, because Philip, a son of your town and My disciple, has reminded you of them. The two most holy of the holy precepts are: "Love God with your whole being. Love your neighbour as yourself". They sum up the Law. And I preach them because through them you are certain to conquer the Kingdom of God. In love you find the strength of persevering in holiness or becoming holy, the strength of forgiveness, the strength of heroism in virtue. Everything can be found in love. Fear does not save: the fear of the judgement of God, the fear of human sanctions, the fear of diseases. Fear is never constructive. It shakes, shatters, throws into disorder, it crushes. Fear leads to despair, it leads only to crafty concealment of evil‑doing, it makes one fear when fear is useless, because evil is already within us.

Who thinks of behaving wisely, for the sake of his body, when one is healthy? No one. But as soon as the first shiver of fever runs through our veins or a stain makes us think of unclean diseases, then fear becomes an added torture to the disease and it becomes a disintegrating strength in a body already broken down by illness. Love instead is constructive. It builds, solidifies, unites and preserves. Love brings hope in God. Love removes from evil-doing. Love makes man deal wisely with his own person, which is not the centre of the universe, as egotists believe and make it, the false lovers of themselves, because they love one part only: the less noble one, to the detriment of the immortal and holy part; but which it is our duty to preserve healthy, as long as God so wishes, in order to be useful to ourselves, to our relatives, to our town and to the whole country.

Diseases inevitably come. It is not true that every disease is the consequence of vice or punishment. There are holy diseases sent by the Lord to His just people, so that in the world, which considers itself the end and the means of pleasure, there may be holy people who are like war‑hostages for the safety of others, and they pay personally expiating through their suffering, the portion of guilt which the world daily accumulates and which would end by crashing on Mankind, burying it under its malediction.

Do you remember old Moses praying while Joshua was fighting in the name of the Lord? You must consider that those who suffer holily, give the greatest battle to the fiercest warrior there is in the world, concealed under the appearances of men and peoples, to Satan, the Torturer, the Origin of all evils, and they fight on behalf of all men. But how much difference there is between such holy diseases sent by God, and those caused by vice through a sinful love of senses! The former are a proof of God's merciful will; the latter are a proof of diabolical corruption. It is therefore necessary to love, in order to be holy, because love creates, preserves and sanctifies.

Like Nehemiah and Ezra, I also, announcing this truth, say to you: "This day is sacred to the Lord our God. Do not be mournful, do not weep". Because all mourning ends, when one lives the day of the Lord. The harshness of death comes to an end, because the loss of a son, of a husband, a father, mother or brother becomes a temporary and limited separation. Temporary because it ends with our death. Limited because it is confined to the body and sense. Our soul does not lose anything when a relative of ours dies. Its freedom is limited in one party only, in us, as survivors with our souls still enclosed in the flesh, while the other party, the one who has passed to second life, enjoys the liberty and power to watch over us and obtain for us much more than when it loved us from the prison of its body.

Like Nehemiah and Ezra I say to you: "Go, eat the fat meat, drink the sweet wine and send a portion to the man who has none, for this day is sacred to the Lord, and therefore nobody must suffer during it. Do not be sad, because the joy of the Lord Who is among you, is the stronghold of those who receive the grace of the Most High Lord within their walls and in their hearts".

You can no longer erect Tabernacles. Their time is over. But erect spiritual ones in your hearts. Climb the mountain, that is, rise towards Perfection. Gather branches of olive, myrtle, palm, oak, hyssop and of every beautiful tree. Branches of the virtues of peace, purity, heroism, mortification, strength, hope, justice, of all virtues. Adorn your souls celebrating the feast of the Lord. His Tabernacles are awaiting you. His. And they are beautiful, holy, eternal, open to all those who live in the Lord. And together with Me, decide today to do penance for the past and to begin a new life.

Do not be afraid of the Lord. He calls you because He loves you. Be not afraid. You are His children like everybody in Israel. Also for you He created the Universe and Heaven, He sent Abraham and Moses, He opened the sea, He created the guiding cloud, He descended from Heaven to give the Law, and He opened the clouds that they might rain manna, and He made the rocks fruitful that they might give water. And now for you also He is sending the living Bread of Heaven to satisfy your hunger and the true Vine and the Fountain of eternal Life to quench your thirst. And through My lips He says to you: "Enter and possess the Land over which I have raised My hand to give it to you". My spiritual Land: the Kingdom of Heaven.»

The crowds exchange enthusiastic words... Then it is the turn of sick people. There are so many. Jesus has them lined up in two rows, and while this is being done, He asks Philip of Arbela: «Why did you not cure them? »

«That they might have what I had: to be cured by You.»

Jesus passes blessing the sick people one by one and the usual prodigy is repeated: the blind see, the deaf hear, the dumb speak, cripples stand straight, fever and weakness cease.

The healing is over. At the end, after the last sick person, there are the two Pharisees who went to Bozrah together with two more. «Peace to You, Master. Are You not saying anything to us? »

«I spoke to everybody.»

«But we do not need those words. We are the saints of Israel.»

«To you, who are masters, I say: comment upon the subsequent chapter, the ninth of the second book of Ezra, remembering how many times so far God has had mercy on you, and repeat the end of the chapter, as if it were a prayer, beating your chests.»

«Quite right, Master, quite right. And do Your disciples do it? »

«They do. It is the first thing I exact of them.»

«All of them? Also the murderers who are in Your group? »

«Does blood smell bad to you? »

«It is a voice crying to Heaven.»

«Then do not imitate those who shed it.»

«We are not assassins! »

Jesus gazes at them piercing them with His eyes. They dare not add one word for some time. But they follow the group which goes back to the house of Philip, who feels bound to invite them to enter and join in the banquet.

«With great pleasure! We will stay longer with the Master » they say bowing very low.

But once in the house they behave like bloodhounds... They watch, they peek, they ask the servants astute questions, and they approach even the old woman, who seems to be attracted by Jesus as iron is by a magnet. But she replies promptly: «Yesterday I saw these only. You must be dreaming. I brought them here, and there was only one John: that fair‑haired boy who is as good as an angel.»

They fulminate against the old woman and turn elsewhere. But a servant, without replying to them directly, bends over Jesus, Who is sitting speaking to the landlord, and asks Him: «Where is John of Endor? This gentleman is looking for him.»

The Pharisee casts a withering glance at the servant and stigmatises him as a «fool ». But Jesus is now aware of their intentions and it is necessary to remedy in the best possible manner. The Pharisee says: «It was to congratulate You, Master, on this wonder of Your doctrine and honour You through the convert.»

«John is far away for good and he will be farther and farther away.»

«Has he relapsed into sin? »

«No. He is ascending towards Heaven. Imitate him, and you will find him in the next life.»

 The four do not know what to say and they wisely change the subject. The servants announce that the meal is ready and they all go into the dining‑room.

 

 

 

295.  Going to Aera.

   6th October 1945.

 

Arbela also is now far away. In the group there are also Philip of Arbela and the other disciple, whose name I hear is Mark.

The road is muddy because of the heavy rain. The sky is overcast. A little river, but quite worthy of this name, crosses the road to Aera. Swollen with the rain which has stormed in this area it is certainly not sky‑blue; it is reddish yellow as if the water had been flowing through ferrous ground.

«The weather is now bad. You did the right thing in sending the women away. It is no longer the season for them to be on the roads » states James sententiously.

And Simon the Zealot, who is always calm in his devotion to the Master, proclaims: «Everything He does, the Master does well. He is not dull like us. He sees and arranges everything for the best, and more to our behalf than to His own.»

John, who is happy to be beside Him, looks up at Him with a smiling face and exclaims: «You are the dearest and best Master the earth ever had, has or will have, besides being the most holy.»

«Those Pharisees... What a disappointment! Also the bad weather has helped to convince them that John of Endor was not there. But why are they so hostile to him? » asks Ermasteus, who is very fond of John of Endor.

Jesus replies: «Their hatred is not against him or because of him. He is an implement which they manoeuvre against Me.»

Philip of Arbela says: «Well the rain has more than convinced them that it was useless to wait for and suspect John of Endor. Long live the rain! It served also to keep You in my house for five days.»

«I wonder how worried those at Aera are! It is surprising that my brother has not come to meet us » says Andrew.

«Meet us? He will be following us » remarks Matthew.

«No. He was taking the road along the lake. Because he was going from Gadara to the lake and by boat to Bethsaida to see his wife and tell her that the boy is at Nazareth and that he will be soon going back. From Bethsaida through Merom he will take the road to Damascus for a little while, and then the road to Aera. He is certainly at Aera.»

There is silence. Then John says smiling: «But that little old woman, Lord! »

«I thought that You were going to grant her the joy of dying on Your chest, as You did with Saul of Kerioth » remarks Simon Zealot.

«I have loved her even more. Because I will wait to call her to Me, when the Christ is about to open the gates of Heaven. The little mother will not have to wait long for Me. She now lives with her remembrance, and with the assistance of your father, Philip, her life will not be so sad. I bless you and your relatives once again.»

John's joy is darkened by a cloud thicker than the ones in the sky. Jesus notices it and asks: «Are you not glad that the old woman will soon be coming to Paradise? »

«Yes... but I am not as it means that You will be going... Why die, Lord? »

«Those who are born of woman, die.»

«Will You have her only? »

«Oh! no! How joyfully will those proceed, whom I save as God, and whom I loved as man...»

They cross two more little rivers, one close to the other. It is beginning to rain on the flat region which stretches in front of the pilgrims after they have climbed the hills at the junction with the road, which follows a valley and runs northwards. A mighty mountain chain appears to the north, or rather to the north‑west, but more north than west, with many clouds piling on the mountain tops, forming almost unreal new tops on the real ones, covered with woods on the sides and with snow on the peaks. But the chain is very far away.

«There is water down here, and snow up there. That is the chain of the Hermon. It has covered its summit with a large white blanket. If there is sunshine at Aera, you will see how beautiful it looks when the sun tinges the high peak with pink » says Timoneus, who is urged by the love for his fatherland to praise the beauty of the country.

«But it is raining now. Is Aera still far? » asks Matthew.

«Yes, very. We shall not be there until this evening.»

«In that case, may God save us from aches and pains » concludes Matthew, who is not very keen on walking in such weather.

They are all wrapped up in their mantles, under which they hold their travelling sacks to protect them from dampness, so that they may change their clothes on arrival, as the ones they are wearing are dripping wet and the bottom parts are heavy with mud.

Jesus is ahead of them, engrossed in thought. The others are nibbling at their pieces of bread and John says jokingly: «There is no need to look for fountains to quench our thirst. It is enough to hold sore heads back and open our mouths and the angels will give us water.»

Ermasteus, who being young is like Philip of Arbela and John so lucky as to take everything humorously, says: «Simon of Jonah was complaining of the camels. But I would rather be on one of those towers shaken by an earthquake than in this mud. What do you think? »

And John: «I say that I am comfortable everywhere, providing Jesus is there...»

The three young men go on talking incessantly. The four older ones quicken their steps and reach Jesus. The remaining couple, that is, Timoneus and Mark follow the rest speaking...

«Master, Judas of Simon will be at Aera...» says Andrew.

«Of course. And Thomas, Nathanael and Philip will be with him.»

«Master... I will regret these peaceful days » says James with a sigh.

«You must not say that, James.»

«I know... But I cannot help it...» and he draws another deep sigh.

«There will be also Simon Peter with My brothers. Does that not make you happy? »

«It does, very much! Master, why is Judas of Simon so different from us? »